We are in Philadelphia. I am anxious to go home. I love my kids and my husband, but being in one little room with them for 7 days is a bit much. For all of us, really.
My knees hurt. We have walked A LOT over the past couple of days. I honestly didn't mind the walking, but my knees sure didn't like it. I have had horrible eating habits since we've been here. I must get more active. I am going to start walking my dogs. both of them. They love to go for walks and it will be good for me.
We got carpet in the den.. but the door to the cats bathroom was shut so the cats pooped and peed on the new carpet. Just our luck, huh? Oh well. What can you do? Clean is up and move along.
I am wishing I had the knowledge to become a web designer or new of a job that I could do freelance. This "having a job" thing just isn't working so well. What could I do freelance and still make some money....
Home Soon
Road Block
I have so much to do, that I don't want to do any of it. Yuck. I just sort of hit this block. I know I have things that I have forgotten to add to my list that I will have to do later - so I need to get everything off my list now.. yuck. Bathe dogs, run errands, clean, laundry, pack.. blech blech blech.
Good news today.. We get our carpet put in on Monday!!! I am so sad we won't be here to see it. I pray (always the pessimist) that it looks okay and that the cats don't puke on it while we are gone!!! YIPES!
Okay. I am going to stop procrastinating. I am going to bathe the dogs. Big one first.. I know, I am brave.
Fabulous
Today was a wonderful day. We nearly didn't go to church, but decided last minute to go anyway. I am so glad we did. I really enjoyed it and was so thankful that we went.
Cody came to visit today. I know this might not seem like a major thing, but it's the first time that Cody has been to our house since February - so it was kind of a big deal. That's a very long story and one that I am not so sure I will ever blog about. We will just say that we've spent a long time trying to mend fences that were damaged by others and are just now getting things back closer to normal.
We took all three kids to Magic Springs. Today was the last day they would be open this year. The weather was glorious! The sun was shining, the park wasn't crowded, and Elijah was finally tall enough to ride some of the big rides he has been eyeballing for the past two years. He actually rode The Gauntlet - which is their big scary roller coaster that spirals and loops and does crazy things. He and Hannah have this love for crazy roller coasters and dangerous rides - I honestly have no idea where they got it from!
So.. next week will be a week of laundry, trying to get ahead at work, and trying to get things lined out here at home for our trip to Philly next week. I will probably be a nervous wreck toward the end of the week, so I am really going to try to enjoy some peace of mind over the next couple of days. Elijah has scans and bone marrows next week and it always makes me crazy nervous. I think we will have better news this time than we did last time. I feel certain that we will. I just wonder what Dr. Maris is going to say our next step for treatment will need to be. More unknown...
Happy Halloween!!
It's Halloween. Just about Elijah's favorite time of the year. He just loves getting candy. I think he is an addict.
I am going to try really hard.. I mean really hard.. to be positive today and not be crappy about a few things that are bothering me. I just don't understand people sometimes, so I am going to stop trying. I have to remember that the world doesn't revolve around our family and that other folks have lives too. I mean, I know this.. but sometimes I get my feelings hurt over little things that shouldn't bother me at all. They aren't geared towards me or have anything to do with me - yet I still feel the sting. I guess that's from being paranoid. Oh well.
Stupid Tired
I am so tired, I am stupid. I love my bed and am so excited to sleep in it. I know that sounds crazy, but having slept in some really uncomfortable places for the past four + years really makes a gal appreciate the queen size pillow top. Chair beds, couch beds, uncomfortable beds at the Ronald McDonald House, airplanes, etc.. I love my bed. That commercial where the family is all sunburned and they come home and lay face down on their bed?? Have you seen it? That's me.
This has been an incredibly long and tiresome week. Chemo every day for Elijah, work for me and Britt, and painting in the evenings. We decided last night we were going to take a break from it and just relax. Elijah and I were hanging out (on my wonderful bed, as a matter of fact) watching game 2 of the world series - and the den flooded again. This time worse than ever. I think Britt must have vacuumed 50 gallons of water out of there if any. It was terrible - and the rain just kept coming. So there went our night of rest. Britt decided that the water was coming from the crawl space under the house. He purchased a sump pump today and will be putting that in tomorrow. We think (we pray) that will take care of it and we will not have to deal with the creek running through the downstairs ever again. I mean, I am all for water features in the house - but not like this.
I am about to put clean, lavender scented sheets on my bed!! I am, admittedly, all giggly about this!!! Good Night!
and the beat goes on..
We have been painting the kitchen. If you have ever been in my house, you know that this kitchen had the ugliest and busiest wallpaper in it. It was awful. We successfully removed most of the wallpaper in the rest of the house (and there was a lot) but the paper in the kitchen was stuck pretty good.. and to unfinished sheetrock. This would have meant a lot of work - and a lot of repair to the walls. To make a long story short, we opted to prime and paint over the wallpaper. It looks fabulous!! I am so proud of Britt and how well this project is going so far! I don't have any "in progress" photos, but do have befores and will hopefully have afters in a few days. We are working really hard on getting our close closer to ready to sell. I pray that we can get it fixed up, relax for a month, and then sell it and move. We shall see how that goes.
Elijah is nearly done with chemo for this go around. Three more days and then we get a week off from the hospital - sort of. We have to go to clinic one day next week for labs and an exam. That will be a cake walk compared to the 5 hours a day we have been spending up there. We go to Philadelphia in three weeks. I pray that things are going in the right direction. I have had to write checks for three funerals for little kids for candlelighters in the past two weeks and have attended one. I can't imagine my life without Elijah. I can't imagine him going through the pain and suffering that some of these other children have endured toward the end of their short lives. I don't know how they do it, honestly - the parents. I guess they just do. I don't think I could get out of bed or speak to anyone for a long time, let alone speak at my own child's life celebration or continue to be an activist. Not for a while anyway. I have an extraordinary little boy. He is my best pal and constant companion. I couldn't breath if he weren't with me. I would die if I never again heard "hey mom!" followed by information on some strange creature he just saw on discovery channel. I just couldn't do it. I couldn't leave the hospital without him.
I wish all of this other "life" stuff would just stop and leave us alone for a while so we can be with Elijah and do fun silly things all day long. I want every birthday to be the "BEST BIRTHDAY EVER!" and for Halloween to be the MOST AMAZING EVER.. and for Christmas to be the MOST MAGICAL EVER! I want this for him and for Hannah always. I want the best of memories for my kids. I don't want any "we never got a chance to" or "we should have made time for that" or "we never got around to it" things lingering around. Those are the kinds of things that will bite you in the rear.
Life. It's today. so all this other crap that HAS to be done.. please go smoothly and quickly so that we may move on to more important things. Thanks. Love ya, Mean it, Buh Bye
back again
I haven't blogged in forever. Well, I have.. but on Elijah's website, not my own. I wish I could say "well, just not much going on".. but that couldn't be further from the truth. We have had too much going on and not enough time to sit and write things other than my assignments for Sociology and Creative Writing. Yep.. still in school. I really should have sat out this semester, but I need to keep on going if I am ever going to finish. Some of my grades are going to suffer this semester, but oh well. I made the deans list once. I was proud. Now I need to just get it done with. By this summer, I should have a degree. It will just be an associates degree, but I will have a degree, dang it. I am still toying with nursing school, but the way things can change so quickly around here, I am concerned about starting nursing school and not being able to finish. Some schools will allow you to pick up where you left off if it's within a certain amount of time, but others make you start all over again. I have to research that and see what would be best, if that's what I decide to do. Who knows.
My sisters wedding is weekend after next. I am not looking forward to being the fat girl in the wedding party. I don't feel pretty in this dress - I feel like the ugly step sister! ha ha. Oh well.. it should be fun. It will be nice to get away for something other than cancer related stuff. What's this? a happy ocassion in our family? NO WAY!