Goals, Not Resolutions

I can't believe is 2010 already. Wow. Time flies. Hannah said the other day "Mom, for my next birthday, I think I want to sky dive". I calmly replied, "Hannah, you can't sky dive until you are 18". "uh, Mom,I will be 18 on my next birthday." oh crap! How could this happen? How could she be so close to alleged adulthood? Elijah is 9 years old now! It seems like he was just born a couple of years ago!
I wish I could sit here and reflect on how wonderful the past year was. Truth is, it wasn't all that great. It's been a whirlwind of travel between home and Philadelphia. Elijah's disease returned again this year and we have been in heavier battle than I think we ever have. I think this past year of treatment has been harder on him than the first year of chemo was. He's frustrated and irritated. I can't say that I blame him. We've had to deal with a lot of emotional turmoil this year. Not just from Elijah's treatment and the search for the right drug, but from some other sources as well. I do think, however, that while it has been challenging and heartbreaking, we've handled things okay. While I say 2009 hasn't been great - it hasn't been all bad either. We have done some pretty amazing things this year. We had a great summer hanging out by the pool. Elijah had a wonderful time at camp. We attended a fabulous conference in Chicago. Elijah was featured in a local magazine, on a Philadelphia news station, in numerous things for Alex's Lemonade Stand Foundation, and in CHOP's annual report. We were able to attend a professional hockey game in Philly. Elijah rode in a limo for his birthday and met Tony Luke, Jr. We've spent lots of time with our dear friends in Philadelphia. We've come to call a major city our second home. Elijah has had the most amazing class for 3rd grade and an awesome cubscout troop. We learned much about our finances and our goals for the future. It's definitely been a year of learning for us - and that's not a bad thing.
I have some goals for 2010. First and foremost is our continued search for the right medicine that will keep Elijah's disease in check and let him be as much of a normal little boy as possible. Second is to finish my associates degree - long overdue. (then maybe I will figure out what to be when I grow up - until then, I am not stressing over it) I want to sell our house and get out from under the pressure of homeownership. I know that sounds crazy, but it's one thing that we can eliminate for now. I would like to actually be able to take a vacation this year. We are gone so much - but all of it is for treatment or is cancer related. I want a weekend away with my husband.. Just one. We haven't done that in what seems like forever. I think before Elijah got sick, actually. That was over 4 years ago. I have many other things I want to do in 2010. Most involve being a better mom and wife. Spending more good quality time with my kids. Less time on facebook. More time with friends. I am working on being more aware - of everything.