A plan... for now anyway.

So after a lot of thought and Britt and I talking it over and weighing all the options, I have decided what to do about my returning to school. I am going to go to a local community college in the Fall and knock out the rest of my pre-requisites. I only lack 6 classes to have all of those taken care of so I will get those done in two semesters at the community college at a much lower cost than the same classes at UALR. I will apply to nursing school in the Spring of next year. That is my plan for TODAY anyway.. I have mulled this over, stressed about it, prayed about it, gotten angry about it.. and now I have decided to be at peace about it. :) Most of the classes I took at UCA when I first went to college were for an English or Business degree and do me very little good towards a degree in nursing. World History I and II are of no use.. Neither is German. Oh well. Now most of what I have to take are science classes so the two semesters at the community college will be rough ones. I will have to take Chemistry and Anatomy and Physiology in the same semester.. Yuck. I do think I am a much better learner than I was the first go round in college though. My last semester at UALR I did really well.. I am hoping to repeat that performance and maintain a good GPA at the community college.
I have been thinking about all the things I want to be sure Elijah has the opportunity to do. Silly little things like ride in a convertable or ride on a motorcycle. He wants to see Mt. Rushmore too so a road trip may be in order! ha ha. It's crazy the way the mind of a cancer mom works - or at least mine anyway. I just spent the last couple of years worrying about what could happen to him and it seems as though we have forgotten to live and enjoy life. I want to start doing that. I want Elijah to experience everything he can. It's sad for me to say "just in case" because I really don't want to think that way.. But I would rather we let him LIVE and really enjoy life, than to regret later on that we spent too much time waiting for his life to end. That would truly be the tragedy, in my opinion.. I wish I had this foresight with the other kids. I thought about it yesterday. A girl at work is getting ready to have a baby. She was being told about how her baby is going to want to be held all the time because she holds her tummy all the time. She just smiled and said "That's okay!". It nearly made me cry. I told her to rock that baby, love that baby, and hold her as much as she could. Cherish every single minute. It's kind of cheesy to quote the song "live like you were dying", but I think it's true. I am tired of waiting for the stars to align, the budget to work out, and the timing to be right. I want to live, enjoy life, and have Elijah experience everything he wants to experience - in his long healthy life. :)