Here is a video of Elijah riding his bike with no assistance from us, or training wheels. Now he loves to ride and wants to do so two and three times each day! I am just so happy that he accomplished this. I think it's an important milestone for every kid.
This sums it up...
One of the other parents on a neuroblastoma message board that I am on wrote this some time ago. It pretty much sums up how we feel on regular basis and what it's like to live with the fear of Elijah relapsing.
Britt and I both agree that this is brilliant.
There's a monster. It lives in our house.
It moved in a long time ago. It must have been hiding in the walls
because we didn't notice him for the longest time. But it was there.
It's the funniest thing because I never really believed in monsters. I
thought they were the stuff of fairy tales. Imaginary beasts that people
made up to explain their fears. They weren't real though. Were they?
But now I know they are real. The thing about monsters is they're not
just big and scary and with sharp teeth. Bears are big and scary with
sharp teeth, but they're not monsters. The difference is that the
monster has a malevolent streak. It's not there because it wants to eat
your garbage; it's there because it means to do you harm.
Disney got it all wrong in Monsters Inc. Don't believe it. That's all
imaginary. Those kinds of cute cuddly monsters don't exist. Steven King
has it right.
The monster sometimes comes into our room at night and slithers
underneath the bed. Its hot breath comes right through the mattress. It
leaves me sweating, scared, unable to sleep. And then a chill settle's
in like the window was left open on a January night.
We've tried to kill it a dozen times. Sometimes it seems like we're
winning, but still it won't die. And even if we kill it, I have this
terrible feeling it will come back from the dead like just like in the
sequel to a bad horror movie.
It's a clever beast and follows us wherever we go. There's no escape. We
can never see it because it hides in the shadows, but it's always there
and has ways of making its presence known. We can't live a normal life.
When we got the dog, we thought maybe he would scare the monster away.
The dog is smart and brave, but somehow he doesn't see the monster. The
monster, though, is keeping its distance. But somehow I think it might
be smarter than the dog and just waiting for its moment.
Try to explain a monster to your friends. They can hear what we're
saying, but they don't quite believe us. We still have all of our body
parts, and none of us has quite gone insane. They've never seen the
monster even though they've been to the house. Still they get the sense
that something isn't quite right. Some of them keep their distance. Now
we just smile and say, "Oh the monster...he's gone back inside the wall.
We're doing fine."
Sometimes our monster doesn't seem so scary. On a sunny day, when the
kids run in the park laughing and playing, we forget that it's back
there waiting for us. You have to forget for a while, or it will get
inside your mind and drive you over the edge.
There are professionals who know how to deal with monsters. Ordinary
folks never meet them other than on a social basis. We feel better when
we're with the professionals. They seem to know what they're doing. But
at night when we are home alone, there is just us... and the monster.
The chill returns.
There's a monster. It lives in our house. It lives in our boy.
I love yard sales
We had a little yard sale this weekend. Elijah and I ran the biz on Friday, and Britt and Elijah ran it on Saturday. We didn't make a million or anything, but we were able to get rid of some stuff that was just taking up space. I actually bought a set of place mats (pier one, no less) at a yard sale a while back for a quarter each. They never made it in the house. I think they were in the garage for a year. I sold them at my yard sale. I bought a piece of garland at a yard sale last year because it was really pretty and a huge bargain. The people had a floral business and this was a 70 dollar piece of garland that I bought for $5. I never found a thing to do with it.. so it was sold. Funny how much of what I got rid of were originally purchased at someone elses sale. Elijah sold lemonade both days and made around $10. He has been saving and saving. He got a coin bank with a digital counter on it a while back. It knows how much money you put in there and keeps track of your balance. Elijah has been saving change for quite some time so he could buy Guitar Hero On Tour for his DS when it came out.. It was $49. Elijah saved $55 just from putting change in there that he found or that Nonna and Papa gave him. Ofcourse, some of the change he "found" was from Britt emptying his pockets at night, or from him looking in my purse for something else and then asking if he could keep the change he found in there.. But.. he managed to save it for something he really wanted. I think that's a great lesson for a kid and he will appreciate that game much more than any that we have just bought for him.
He is learning to ride his bike without training wheels. It's really a great thing to see the look on his face when he is riding without any help. I am getting the biggest kick out of watching Britt teach him too. Stuff like that makes me fall in love with my husband all over again. I watched a video last night of the two of them playing basketball when Elijah was three. It was wonderful.
Hannah is volunteering at a camp for spina bifida kids this week. She was scared to death, but ready for the challenge. I am so proud of her. I know she will be fabulous.
Time to get my day started, I suppose. My house is a mess. Elijah was supposed to go to Vacation Bible school this week - Hannah and I were supposed to help out too. With him having clinic, Hannah being at camp Aldersgate, and us being so out of touch with changes going on at church, I just didn't feel comfortable being there this week. I am really trying to not say yes to every single volunteer opportunity that presents itself. It's hard for me - but I commit to all this stuff and it just stresses me out instead of making me happy.
Okay.. enough whining.
Just a plain ole update
Things are good here in the Talley house. Elijah is safely back from camp and Hannah is home this week. Next week she will go to Aldersgate to be a camp counselor there for spina bifida camp. She is a bit nervous but I think she will do wonderfully.
I think I am about to go full time at the hospital. I will be working some crazy hours, but honestly that's what I need to work right now so I can still be home with Elijah during the week. I may possibly be working a 16 hour shift on Sundays starting the second week in July. Yipes! It will be good to be full time though. I will get more for tuition reimbursement and get more benefits - which is always a good thing!
I am going to have a yard sale on Friday. The kids really want a pool membership so we are going to try to get rid of some stuff to pay for it rather than take it out of the already struggling budget. So far so good - we have $25 to go towards the membership!
I have my two books to start studying for the to CLEP tests I plan to take. I just need to have some spare time to start reading. It just seems like there is so much going on right now. I really want to get these tests done so I can take Anatomy and Physiology in the Fall. Thats my main goal as far as school goes. I want to take A&P so I can apply to nursing school in January and have that out of the way.
We are hosting another lemonade stand in a few weeks! We are super excited about this one. We won't have the tv appearances and such that we did with the other - but we have already made quite a bit on t-shirt sales!
So.. we have that going on, normal summer stuff for the kids, Hannah gets her braces off in two weeks, Gallery of Hope is coming up in the Fall so we are busy with planning that, Elijah and Hannah and camp activities, Britt taking his tests, me trying to do school stuff, both of us working full time - AND the house. Now that Riverfest and the first lemonade stand are over, it has quieted down some though.
Last week when Elijah was at camp, Britt and I had the opportunity to spend some time alone. It was good for us, I think. We don't really get much alone time anymore. It just reminded me how much I really enjoy his company.
Guess I will end this now.. I wanted to write something really deep about something, but I am too tired.. ha!
Riverfest
I had great intentions of getting a few entries in last week, but didn't have time between work, getting stuff ready for camp, kid stuff, doctors appointments, and my daily required lazy time. ha ha! Seriously, I just haven't felt much like writing lately, or reading too much either. It's crazy. I love to read books and generally always have one or two that I am working on, but right now I just don't feel like reading. I think I have so much going on in my head that I know I can't fit much more in there right now.
Riverfest was fantastic this year. I got to hear Huey Lewis sing a couple of songs - and it was fabulous! In all the years we have been doing the festival, we rarely get to hear any of the bands perform. Next year I am going to make it a mission to watch a few songs from at least three artists. This year I heard Huey Lewis and Chaka Khan. very cool. In the years past, Elijah has always hated Riverfest. I think it's because Britt and I are always working, he wants to be there with us, but we send him with Britt's parents. They have been great to bring him out there each year, but he generally gets upset and wants to stay. Last year was even more dificult because we had just found out the week before that his cancer had returned. He was in a great deal of pain and on a LOT of pain medication. This year Elijah felt really good. My BFF John was super uncle and took him down to the kids zone area and he got to make sand art and eat a funnel cake.. He had a blast!! He loved it! One of my other goals for next year is to find a way that we can include Elijah more and let him enjoy more of the festival. I think he doesn't like it because he doesn't get to do much of the cool stuff that we have going on.. So next year, scheduled Elijah time for festival is going to be on the top of the list. I also think he may stay with us some next year too.
It's a lot of hard work to pull off a festival of this magnitude. It's all run by volunteer power and to be the one to help coordinate all the volunteers throughout the weekend is just an amazing opportunity for me. I love seeing the improvements to the downtown area take shape that the festival has contributed to. It's really a great feeling to know that we are doing something to give back to the community that we love so much. Now if we could just do something about our schools......
Elijah is at camp quality this week. It's his first year to go. I am sure he is having a fantastic time, but I must admit that I am a bit lonely without him. Today is an oddity for me. I am home by myself all day. This never happens. I am not sure what to do with myself. I have tons of cleaning to do so I guess I will occupy myself that way. I would like to go get my hair cut.. hmmmmmm Maybe I will just nap.
So Much To Tell...
I have many stories to tell, but not time to put them all down, so I will just give a brief rundown.
This past weekend was Riverfest. Britt and I are on the committee so we were busy from Thursday morning until MOnday morning at the festival. It was great fun. It's alway neat to see something so huge run so well. Riverfest will be my blog topic tomorrow (or the next time I blog)
I was able to sit down and visit with a homeless woman while we were working at Riverfest. Of all the years I have been working the festival, I have always come in contact with many homeless folks. This was the first time I felt compelled to visit (I mean really visit) with any of them. I really felt a connection with her and would love to share her story. Terri's story will come later this week as well.
I have baby birds living in my garage. Not sure how many there are, but they are just now learning to fly. Elijah has really enjoyed watching these babies grow. It makes me glad that I didn't move the nest out right after we found it. We just have to duck sometimes when we go out there!! At one point, a few of the birds fell out of the nest. Zach had to pick them up and put them back in there.
Duchess got out the other day and took off up the street in the rain. She came back, but not after Eli got good and upset. It was storming and she is petrified of storms. He wasn't so much worried that she wouldn't come back, but that she was really scared because of the thunder. Sweet boy.
I am going through all of this "I wish we could start from scratch" phase, I guess. I think it has something to do with my friend Susan moving away (:( I miss you!). I wish we could just sell this house, move to something smaller, get rid of both of our cars, and live more simply - but we are too far in the hole with all of it. yuck. If our house had a working AC upstairs, I think we could patch the rest of the stuff up enough to sell it - but not with a repair that major.
I am going to fix the tv for Eli and chill for a bit. We have been running errands all day.
Peace
I need a new picture
I need to find a halfway decent picture of myself and put it on here, instead of the one that is on here. I don't know why I just thought of that. I just did. It's nearly 1am. I just got home from work and I am tired, but not ready to go to bed yet. I feel like I have really been working a lot lately. I had Monday off and I have Friday off. Thank goodness Friday is almost here.
A little girl really touched my heart at work tonight. They just found out today that she has diabetes. She is about 9. So sweet. I had to help hold her arm and keep her still while they started her iv. She had never been in a hospital before in her life and she was petrified. She was scared to death, but didn't move a bit and didn't make a sound. She was so good for everything. I wanted to hug her and tell her it would be okay. Her family had that overwhelmed look that I have seen so many times in newly diagnosed cancer families - a look that I remember us having. That look that tells you these people realize life will never be the same from this moment on.
I am doing okay. Working too much to work on my quiet reflection that I really want to work on. I have been in prayer a lot lately, which is good for me.
Mother's Day is coming up. I think that's a whole different blog topic though. I have been missing my mom something terrible over the past few months. I will blog on that maybe tomorrow. Now, I am going to bed.